bingung sungguhan bingung

i do

hmm.should i think itz all done???

when i'm done with thinking, then i'm done with you.
when i'm done with crying, then i'm done with you.
when i feel so tired, then i'm done with you.
everybody feels this way sometimes, everybody feels this way -

and i do.
you can't hear it, but i do.
you can't hear it, but i do.

you're trying to convince me that what i've done's not right.
i get so frustrated, i stay up every night.
you ask me for an answer, and i'm so tired and i'm up in the air.
everybody feels this way sometimes, everybody feels this way -

and i do.
you can't hear it, but i do.
you can't hear it, but i'm feeling this way
just because you say

i will be ignored.
i will be denied.
i could be erased.
i could be brushed aside.
i will get scared, and i will get shoved down,
but i feel like i do beause you push me around.

i'm starting to ignore you, i've doubted you so long.
i'm tired of over-thinking, i know you don't belong.
now i'm asking questions - no one pushes me around.
everybody feels this way sometimes, everybody feels this way -

and i do.
you can't hear it, but i do.
you don't seem angry, but i do.
i do.

marriage

Akhir-akhir ini banyak temen2 yg ika kenal memutuskan buat MENIKAH. Temen seangkatan, ade kelas, temen sma, n many more.it makes me questioning smtg, “kok bisa sih??” we are young enough, baru 22 gituh, n marriage is such a life-or-death decision, we will spend the rest of our life wth him/her, n we cant playback our status to be single. Katanya sih, mereka emang udah dapet “feelnya” sama pasangan mereka n finally they dicided to be with 4 ever. se simple itu kah??for me itz so fuckin confusin, mungkin casenya beda kali yah, I really want 2 build my career, which after married there must be some difference . I also have a planning 2 get married soon (hope soo), tapi ya itu tadi sikonnya skarang kompleks bgt, siapa yg mau ngalah nantinya, masa sih orang nikah jauh2an, but im sure skarang g ada yg mau ngalah,hahaha…
Mungkin ika terlalu perfeksionis sama yg namanya pernikahan, satu syarat yg pasti, ika pengen dapetin orang yg sayangnya ke ika X+1+2+… setelah nikah, bukannya jadi x-1-2-…, well thatz often happen to married-couple, n I wont let it happen to me, tapi katanya semua ada phasenya, kayak life cycle product gituh, sesaat setelah dia mature, lama kelamaan bakalan jenuh dan jadi declining, so kita mesti di intersection antara growth & mature, supaya g sampe titik jenuh. Ko jadi ngbahas life cycle gini yah,hahaha…
Ko sekarang ika jadi pesimistis gini yah? Well, I appreciate any decision for them to get married in a young age, salut bgt justru, berani ambil keputusan yg bakal ngrubah hidup seseorang ( subtitle : ga bebas maen lagi, kemana2 mesti ijin dulu, pulang malem ada yg mlototin, hahahahaha)
Yah nikmatin aja lah smuanya, being single is the greatest gift, hahaha

don't ever give up.......

For those who lose faith & hope, don't ever give up!!!!
cheerss :D

"There's a hero

If you look inside your heart

You don't have to be afraid

Of what you are

There's an answer

If you reach into your soul

And the sorrow that you know

Will melt away


And then a hero comes along

With the strength to carry on

And you cast your fears aside

And you know you can survive

So when you feel like hope is gone

Look inside you and be strong

And you'll finally see the truth

That a hero lies in you


It's a long road

When you face the world alone

No one reaches out a hand

For you to hold

You can find love

If you search within yourself

And the emptiness you felt

Will disappear


And then a hero comes along

With the strength to carry on

And you cast your fears aside

And you know you can survive

So when you feel like hope is gone

Look inside you and be strong

And you'll finally see the truth

That a hero lies in you


Lord knows

Dreams are hard to follow

But don't let anyone

Tear them away,

Hold on

There will be tomorrow

In time

You'll find the way "

"kopi..kopi...silakan coba kopi gratisnya"

seminggu ini tiap hari tereak2 kata2 ituh, udah faseh bgt dah, setelah jadi jongos karfur sekarang jadi jongos nescafe+milo...
sayangnya bukan ke mol tapi ke pasar yang bau+becek banget banyak lalernya lagih, tapi nyenengin bgt bisa bagi2 kopi sama jualan kopi "neskape" kalo kata orang sunda. Yg kurang ajar banyak abang2 yg ngeres2, ngedenger kata2 "kopi susu tubruk" maleus deh....
yg lucu ada bapa2 aneh nanya "mba kopinya rasa apa?asin ga?" saking anehnya itu pertanyaan, sampe2 qt bengong sampe si bapanya pergi, dasar orang aneh!!!!
bener2 penuh perjuangan, ngider pake van butut, ga ada ac, sampe2 mu masuk k mobil harus loncat dulu dari pintu depan soalnya pintu tengah g bisa dibuka, belom lagi deg2an kalo ketemu polisi+DLLAJ soalnya tu mobil g ada stnk+ ga ada kir, lengkaplah penderitaan, tapi sumpah seruuuu...walhasil diriku jadi hitam, jerawatan dan gendut karna makan terus,wahahaha...kangen bandung pengen pulang, sabtu-minggu tetep kerja, cemangat!!!!!

Itz been my 3 weeks working...setelah in class training slm 2 mggu, tibalah saatnya mulai kerja beneran, and my first task iss.....menjadi brand presenter a.k.a SPG di Depok!!!owh my god, ga kbayang 8 hours stand up at those suits!!!! but thanks god it just 4 a week, tapi dapet shiftnya jam 2 sampe jam 10 malem, n sabtu-minggu masuk kerja, nikmat....
bener2 ngetes mental, yah semoga aja smuanya serba smooth, cant wait 4 my first task...
eh..eh...finally ketemu pacar, senaaang....tapi effortnya luar biasa, dari tb simatupang ke sunter pake busway berdiri spanjang jalan demi ketemu pacar, smangaaattt!!!!!!

Waktu ku kecil....

Hari ini rencananya mau diadain rapat keluarga, sehubungan halal-bihalal setelah lebaran nanti, dan tiap keluarga diminta bawa foto keluarga jadulnya buat dipajang di slide show pas acara nanti.
Walhasil si mamah rariweuh nyari foto2 keluarga, setelah sedikit mengubek2 rumah ketemu deh beberapa album berdebu yang kayaknya ga pernah disentuh bertahun-tahun lamanya (lebay ga sih?). mlai dari foto kawinan mamah+papah sampe foto2 kelahiran anak2nya, yang aneh kok fotoku ga ada dimana2 yaah?? wah langsung meragukan status sebagai anak kandung. setelah ngubek2 beberapa album akhirnya ada juga foto ika pas lagi bayi, umur 2 taunan sampe umur 8 taun. Mayoritas didominasi sama foto2nya si teteh sama aa, n yg paling dikit ya fotonya ika. alesan si mamah+papah kurang lebih gini, " Waktu teteh lahir papah masih semangat foto2, tapi pas kamu lahir papahnya udah sibuk jadi foto kamu dikit deh". Pas denger ketawa aja, tapi nyesek aja, gimanapun itu kan momen hidup yang ga bisa diulang lagi cuma bisa dikenang lewat foto, hix..
Lucu aja ngeliat foto si mamah yg luar biasa gayya, dengan rambut2 sasak aduhay, plus pake rok mini, tapi sekarang anaknya pake rok pendek dikit aja langsung senewen.
Trus ada foto bertiga sama teteh+aa dengan muka culun2 tapi ngangenin, sayang bgt scanner lagi error jd ga bisa ditempel disini de. Oia ada juga aa ika yg ud alm, ga sempet kenal karena cuma beberapa jam dikasih kesempatan setelah lahir ketemu papah+mamah abis itu dipanggil lagi sama Allah.
Jadi inget dulu sering dikerjain, dibikin nangis, dibego-begoin sama teteh sama aa rasanya sebeeell banget pengen cepet2 gede biar ga dikerjain terus, tapi sekarang kalo inget2 lagi jadi kangen sekaligus sedih, how wonderfull it was when we were kids, cuman bego aja anak kecil suka pundungan,hehehe.....
ntar deh klo scannernya dah bener discan smua foto2nya, n see how innocent i was ...
M,D,S,B Love you sow..